Yes, you hate them. So what?
-Notice from your Commanding General-
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from members, it will be our policy to keep all members well trained through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)
We are trying to give our members more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please see your Duke. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T list, and our Vice Dukes are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S.H.I.T you can handle.
Members who don't take S.H.I.T will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMERGENCY EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).
Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to EXTRA ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T). Since our Commanders and Majors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't have to do S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already. If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).
For members who are intending to pursue a career in management and consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T). This course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T
If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).
-Just Kidding!-
Submitted by gaston668
You Just Got PWND: =D
1.) you accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) you haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3.) the reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have a screen name or a myspace.
4.) you'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the tv.
6.) your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) you read this list, & keep nodding and smiling.
8.) as you read this list, you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5
10.) you actually looked up to check if there was a number 5.
11.) and now you're laughing at your stupidity.
12.) Put this on your web/youtube/myspace/whatever page if you got owned, and you know you did
Submitted by Light1234525
My past faves on http://jokes.comedycentral.com/joke_of_day.aspx
Coming soon
You know you've been playing too much maplestory when...
School
Your mom asks to take you to school, but you say: "What? School? Ima check my map of there is such land, be right back."
You're late to school and your principle asks, "Why are you late", you say, "I was lagging."
Your teacher scold you for being late for class, you say "I am only allowed to wear my school uniform, not a speed based clothing."
Your teacher annoys you. You add her to blacklist.
You ask your teacher, "r u a boss? ur boredom does 1029 dmg on me..."
Your teacher gives you a test papper you say, "is this a quest ??"
You're a gifted kid and get an F and the teacher asks "How much intelligence should a kid like you have?" and you answer "None, I'm a Dit."
You meet a new kid at school and asks if he wants to be your buddy. You say: Ok...let me see (grabs paper) whats your IGN?
Hey why not download the MS theme song?
It's a treat for reading the jokes.
Humm its a lot longer and different from the bit you usually hear when logging in... lol thats only like the first 30 seconds of it.
| welcometomaplestory.mp3 | |
| File Size: | 3769 kb |
| File Type: | mp3 |
After school
You're at a construction site and ask a worker, "What atk is ur work glove?"
You go to the fish market and ask what attack is their Frozen Tuna.
Someone asks your grandma's age, and you say level 82.
U see a kid jumping and u ask him, "wt lvl ur flash jump?
A friend says he's getting married, and you say, "meet u in Amoria 2nite!"
You are about to get into a fight and say "Hold on let me re-pot"
Someone steals something from you and you scream, "OMG I GOT HACKED!"
You go to a resturant and say, "how much HP does ur pumkin pie heal?"
You are at someone's birthday party and say, "ZOMG LVL UP!"
Someone farts really bad and so you say, "OMG THAT STINKS....... WHAT LVL IS UR POISON FOG, ITS DOING 2789 DMG TO ME!!!"
Your grandpa dies, and you ask your parents, "did grandpa dc?"
You're lost in your neighborhood, so you kill yourself to respawn home.
Change of Channel
You ask someone to change tv channels, you say cc plz.
You get onto a very long line you tell evryone to cc plz!
Someone said this on a Smega:
Do you know why Mushdad broke up with Mushmom?
Because she's always at 'Someone else's house'.
